Tag Archives: Vagina

Woman Sent Text Message “I’m Smuggling Cocaine & Heroin in my….” Before Being Arrested

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Ladies it is no secret that your vagina is multi-purpose. it brings joy, gives birth, makes ATM cash withdrawls, controls emotions, but in what you thought you only saw in prison documentaries is now real life its a drug transport.

22-year-old Samntha kurdilla was walking back into the United States last week from Tijuana, Mexico when a drug detection dog “alerted to a narcotic odor” emanating from her “groin area.” (maybe she shoulda rubbed her crotch with coffee beans)

Kurdilla was walking arm-in-arm with James Perry, who announced, “I’m not with her” when the canine signaled interest in his female companion. Detained at a “pedestrian crossing facility” by Customs and Border Protection agents, Kurdilla was asked if she was “bringing anything from Mexico.” In response, the Pennsylvania resident “gave two negative declarations,”

Claiming that she was returning to a Best Western hotel in San Diego, Kurdilla (seen above) told investigators that she had been partying with Perry, 44, in Tijuana, where they had been smoking marijuana.

Despite Kurdilla’s denials, federal agents later determined that she had a condom filled with 100 grams of cocaine “within her vaginal cavity.” After being read her rights, Kurdilla admitted to drug smuggling “in exchange for compensation,” adding that the cocaine–worth several thousand dollars–belonged to Perry.

When he was questioned, Perry reportedly confessed to the smuggling attempt, saying that he directed Kurdilla to hide the narcotics in her vagina so that he could resell the cocaine in the U.S..

In addition to the confessions, federal agents retrieved some particularly damning evidence during a search of Kurdilla’s cell phone. Text messages sent to an unknown individual left little doubt as to what Kurdilla was doing south of the border.

“I’m smuggling cocaine and heroin in my coochie,” Kurdilla wrote.

A felony complaint filed against Kurdilla and Perry only references cocaine, so it is unclear whether Kurdilla’s statement about heroin in her coochie was incorrect (or perhaps she was referring to a separate smuggling attempt).

Could you imagine being the agent who had to go digging for the evidence?

Ignorant News: Ladies! Don’t Shave Your “Lady Parts!” It’s ‘Decembeaver’

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More than 1.2 million men grew out their moustaches in November to raise awareness for men’s cancers. Now, women want to throw away their razors for 30 days for just as good a cause.

For eight years now, Movember has encouraged guys around the world to grow out the hair on their faces for a month, in order to start conversations around and raise awareness for the often taboo topics of testicular and prostate cancers.

Tired of feeling excluded from the manly campaign, a few comedians got together to launch Decembeaver, an initiative that encourages women to decline to shave or wax below the belt. While the concept is campy, Decembeaver’s founders seem serious in their goal to raise awareness and funds for the American Cancer Society.

In the “Goodbye Movember, Hello Decembeaver” spoof, three deadpan women make the case for declining to groom their lady parts in order to take a stand against cancer.

“Every year, as men grow out their moustaches for Movember. Women are left out,” one activist says in a YouTube video. “What can we not do? What can we stop doing?”

Read more here!

Ignorant News: Milan Marinkovic Honors Wife Last Request, Carves Her Vagina On Her Tombstone

When Milan Marinkovic’s wife Milena died three years ago, she left a very personal request for him to fulfill: She wanted a stonemason to engrave a replica of her private parts on the tombstone.

Her intention for the rather public display of her privates was simple: She wanted to ensure that Marinkovic, a resident of Belgrade, Serbia, never looked at another woman, according to The Sun.

“I don’t want you chasing other women. This way you will always remember me,” she said in a letter explaining her bizarre last request, according to the Austrian Times.

Making the request was one thing. Fulfilling it was another.

Although Milena left detailed instructions, including photos, of her sex organ to ensure complete accuracy, her husband had a rocky time finding a stonecutter who would agree to the request. Most of those told Marinkovic the request was blasphemous, according to NewsFixNow.

Despite the struggle, Marinkovic recently found a mason who was willing to do the titillating tombstone engraving and the results are on display at the cemetery.

“Now it’s finished I love it and it’s a really good likeness,” he told the Austrian Times. “And this way, a part of her will always be with me.”

Source

 

Florida Woman Sues Police Saying “Personal” Item Was Removed During Search

 

 

 

 

 

This has got to be the first incident (documented or otherwise) or a pull over and a pull out and I am not talking about someone running away from the police.

In the beautiful state of California, Florida resident Leila Tarantino (yeah the same last name as the famous direct Quentin, and this sounds like it came out of one of his movies) has filed a lawsuit, yes this is going to COURT, against the Citrus County Sheriff’s Department. The reason for the lawsuit is not being stopped for allegedly rolling through a stop sign which she swears she stopped. Instead the charge is a lot more……colorful.

Tarantino says that she was strip-searched on side of the road after being detained for two hours, in full view of her children and by every driver in Beverly Hills, but while a female officer was searching for drugs she…….wait for it…….forcibly removed her tampon. Just yanked it out.

That female cop is a beast, a demon, and just damn disgusting you saw that dangling ass string what she thought it was attached to POP ROCKS.

Woman Gives Birth to Her Own Grandson

 

 

 

 

 

Yeah this is one of those headlines that make you literally yell out “WHAT IN THE HELL ! ! !” or you start thinking “Maybe Marty McFly did get drunk and go all the way with Lorraine Baines ,his mom in 1955.” (That’s a Back To The Future reference). But this truly did happen and even I had to read this a couple of times just to make sure I wasn’t losing my mind. Here’s what happened.

In Portland,Maine 49-year old Linda Sirois allowed herself to be the surrogate for her 25-year old daughter Angel Hubert and her 29-year old husband Brian.  Now the reason they had to do this is because Angel suffers from a heart condition that will not allow her to be able to carry a child to term and go thru with the delivery without running the risk of killing her.

Now in case you don’t know how the process works I will break it down to you.  Doctors took sperm from Brian and used it to fertilize one of his wife’s (Angel) eggs-because lets be honest at 49 if Linda had any eggs left they are more than likely on the clearance rack and the expiration date is right around the corner.  But I digress, after the egg is fertilized it is then implanted into Sirois.

Sirois said that compared to her four other pregnancies this one that she carried was actually the easiest because she didn’t experience any morning sickness or complications. She delivered the baby boy, Madden Hubert via c-section which came out 7 pounds 14 ounces, because if she tried to push it out of that birth canal there may have been tore down roads, blockage and just …….

Linda says that when it came to carrying her own grandchild ”It was their child all along,”  ”It was just a room for rent.” She also goes on to say that ”I just saw it as I was babysitting for a few months.” This believe it or not is this not the 1st time a woman has carried her own grandchild but my question is how soon before we here of the baby being implanted and the husband saying, “Well what the hell can i just smash your moms, because hell she’s already carrying my kid.”

Educated Insanity Interviews the ‘Glam Goddess’ Tyomi Morgan

Jay Washington and Illinois Jones got an opportunity to sit and get in-depth with the Glam Goddess and blogger of the GLAMerotica 101 website, Ms Tyomi Morgan.

This interview went into discussion of women’s personal health, spicing up the relationship, the amazing wondrous delight that is female ejaculation, as well as the EXXXOTICA expo in Chicago,IL July 13-15.

Check out Tyomi at www.glamerotica101.com

Comedienne Aarona Browning Buys a Bikini

Nowadays everyone has a website, BLOG or even a VLOG and some have some interesting information , some get you EDUCATED on NEWS, SPORTS, COMEDY, ENTERTAINMENT and IGNORANT S#@! (like this one-cheap plug). others at a few times unfortunately dont.

But this one here that I have been introduced to, especially this installment really will captivate the mind and the senses and quite frankly may send them into overload.  Check out my girl Comedienne Aarona Browning along with Comedienne Lourdes “Lou-Lou” Gonzalez as they go shopping for Aarona’s 1st ever bikini.

A Picture Is Worth a 1000 words

Well the Miami Heat finished off the Oklahoma City Thunder to give Lebron James his 1st NBA Championship as well as NBA Finals MVP and I guess you could say that congratulations are in order.

But during the locker room celebration this photo was taken of one Chris Bosh in a somewhat ‘compromising’ position during the ceremonial champagne pour.

Now they say a picture is worth a 1000 words but this here is about 2.5million and has a soundtrack to it.

Brian McKnight Takes to the Internet To Sing About The Female Body

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Iconic R&B signer/songwriter Brian McKnight is back once again and in an attempt to “reinvent” himself if your would.  This time he took to the internet and to promote a new sound and a new song.

Now the song has the melodic value that McKnight has become known and loved for but ummmmm the song itself may raise a few eyebrows.  The name of the song is entitled “If You’re Ready to Learn” but the lyrics and the chorus are what has sent the internet abuzz….

“lemme show you how your p***y works”, “betcha didn’t know that it could squirt”…….YEAHHHHH ! ! ! This dude is having BEYOND A MIDLIFE CRISIS check out the video for yourself

See What Happens When You Don’t Get your Main Chick a Gift

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Soooooooooooooooooo ladies if your man didn’t get you a Valentines Day do you just go straight off the damn deep end and try to prison shank him….well that is what this woman did.

Kierra Reed, 22 of Colerain Township,OH (ummm that by Cincinnati) got into a verbal argument with her man when he didn’t get her anything, then it went from verbal to her scratching and clawing and pushing, and then the dude (who’s identity remains withheld—In my CHEATERS announcer voice) locked himself in a bedroom. She then got even more pissed said she was gonna kill him, went to the kitchen got a butcher knife and pulled a Jack Nicholson from The Shining on the door.  That’s when somebody, who heard the noise called the police, cause more than likely dude didn’t get a chance to grab his phone and they arrested her on the spot.

El Crazy chick has been charged with Aggravated Menacing …..MENACING ! ! ! !

Jay’s thought- one of two things happened, either A she was gonna get a gift after that man got paid which was probably later in the week or had it hidden or B-he knew she was PMS’ing he wasn’t gone get none so he decided to pray on it wait a week then do a delayed Valentines Day.