Homeless Man Arrested For Strangling Pelican

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s not even safe out in the streets of Malibu, California for pelicans anymore. You know pelicans the bird that doubled as toilets on The Flintstones.

Here’s where it gets bad it was done by a homeless person. Sergio Alvarez, 30, told the police that originally found the bird already dead, then he turned around and allegedly admitted that he had killed the pelican because he was hungry and hadn’t been able to catch any fish. So as a homeless man he couldn’t hustle up any change and get a McDouble.

Now check this out a witness just passing by told the sheriff’s deputy that he had spotted a man choking a pelican. Witnesses said Alvarez had his hands around the bird’s throat, and that the animal was flapping its wings in distress before going completely limp (oh no the bird couldn’t had been in distress this was just Avian Auto-Erotic Asphyxiation –that choking/hanging yourself while you get off…sexually)

Alvarez was arrested and booked on $20,000 bail, which I strongly doubt he posted. Alvarez pleaded no contest to a misdemeanor charge of of animal cruelty to a bird, and was sentenced to 60 days in jail and one year’s probation. While brown pelicans are no longer considered an endangered, they are a fully protected species in California.

Our condolences go out to the family of that pelican. The bird was just trying enjoy a nice night on the beach he had NO IDEA he was gonna become LUNCH.

More “Zombie-Like” Behavior Happening Due to Drug Use

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So now we go from trying to get ‘super-high’ and eating on people, to trying to get ‘super-high’ and eating on….the family dog???

Well thats what happened in of all places…Waco, Texas, yes the sight of the infamous David Koresh cult incident.

According to Waco Police they were called back on June 14th by family members when they say Michael Daniel Monday, 22 went on a bad trip off of not ‘bath salts’ but off of the synthetic weed (marijuana) known as K-2.

Family say Monday after ingesting the k-2 began assaulting people in the home, chasing a neighbor and barking and growling. After words he grabbed the family dog, beat it then strangled it and afterwards proceeded to eat it.  So nobody thought to pick up a broom, bat or two-by-four (2×4) and stop him huh??

Monday was taken to the hospital and is being charged with felony cruelty to animals….you think??

This is one of those stories where you clearly go….”insert Chinese Food joke here”